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"To listen fully means to pay close attention to
what is being said beneath the words. You listen not only to the
'music,' but to the essence of the person speaking. You listen not only
for what someone knows, but for what he or she is. Ears operate at the
speed of sound, which is far slower than the speed of light the eyes
take in. Generative listening is the art of developing deeper silences
in yourself, so you can slow our mind's hearing to your ears' natural
speed, and hear beneath the words to their meaning." -- Peter Senge
Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh has been described as a cross
between a cloud, a snail and a piece of heavy machinery. I could never
be called a snail given my preferred pace, but I do aspire to the
lightness of a cloud and the powerful presence of a piece of heavy
machinery. This summer, I've been realizing that moving more slowly
might be a precondition for that lightness of touch and depth of
presence.
Will you join me in a powerful little experiment today? Try slowing down.
Pause before you take any action. Notice the sensations in your body.
Admire the sun slanting through the trees. Find something to
appreciate in your child before you open your mouth. Breathe. Find that deeper silence within yourself.
A few questions I'm finding useful:
1. Does slowing down make everything in your life deeper, including your listening?
2. Can you use your pause button to bring your deepest attention every time you interact with your family today?
3. What do you need to do for yourself today so that you can slow down enough to really hear your child?
4. What happens if you just sit for three minutes with the intention to feel a state of peace?
5. How does your child's behavior change when you slow down and really listen?
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