Parenting Blog

"Some nights I look in on our sleeping children before I go to bed. I watch their softly tousled heads slumbering on their pillows, and sadness wells up in me. Have I drunk in their smiles and laughter and hugged them, or have I just checked things off my to-do list today? They're growing so quickly. One morning I may wake up and one of my girls will be getting married, and I'll worry: Have I played with them enough? Have I enjoyed the opportunity to be a part of their lives?"
-- Janet Fackrell

Research shows we need five positive interactions to each negative interaction to maintain a healthy, happy relationship.

It's part of our job description to enforce limits with our children, deny their requests, correct their behavior.   Sometimes we're skillful enough that our child doesn't even perceive those interactions as "negative" -- but that's rare.  More often, they give us the benefit of the doubt because all the other loving, affirming interactions create a positive balance in our relationship account.  But when we're short on positive interactions, our relationship balance dips into the red. That's when kids develop attitude, whether they're two or twelve.

What can you do today to refill your relationship account with your child?  Write down five things and do at least one each day this week.