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Stay at Home Moms vs. Dads

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Question

Dr. Markham,
I appreciate your view that children are better off, at least when they are young, with a parent with them when they aren't at school. But why does it have to be women, that's what I want to know. I love my job, and of course I love my two boys, ages 3 and 5, but it would drive me crazy to be home with them all the time.
Karen

Answer

Dear Karen,
It should be apparent to you from other postings on this site that I agree with you 100%. It is patently unfair for women to be the ones to give up professional aspirations to stay home with children for years. And yet young children benefit tremendously from having parents with them most of the time, and from having two parents who are completely involved in their lives. Stanley Greenspan, author of "The 4/3 Solution" suggests that both parents work 2/3 time when their kids are young, so they can provide most of the care for their children. When that's not possible, many families find it ideal is to switch who stays home, so that one year it's Mom, and another it's Dad.
Dr. Laura

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